You have finally met your guy! You were both overjoyed the first time you were together. However, as time went on, you feel like something has changed. What happened to the passionate relationship that you have started as a couple? You are now starting to blame each other whenever you feel like things are not going the right way. You stopped calling your guy those endearing names (e.g. hon, boo, babe, honey, love) you used to call him. He turns his back on you when you sleep on bed.
You are now stressed asking yourself WHY your relationship is turning into losing end.
Let’s see. I have listed my presumptions why your relationship is somewhat failing. Just read on.
1. Your relationship has no strong foundation to last. Most intimate relationships last longer if it started out from a great friendship. Some couples must first go into that level where they see each other as a good companion, a true friend and most importantly, as their real selves. They jumped instantly into a kind of relationship where they have to commit to each other without being conscious that they may have different wants and needs. They do not know each other that much to go along very well.
2. Trust issues. Have you ever experienced the feeling of wanting to just walk-out because you couldn’t believe what your guy or girl is saying? Trust fades away when someone felt the feeling of betrayal of another. In effect, that person will feel upset not because he was betrayed but because he has now slighter capacity to believe what the other is doing or saying. Have you felt stressed because you think your guy spends his night with another girl? Jealousy generally occurs when there is a feeling of competition. On the other hand, we need to not let jealousy win over our thoughts. Being doubtful is poisonous. It can cause hatred, anger and insecurities to oneself.
3. You’re still in-love with another guy or girl. If we do not know where we are, we will never know where to start. Do you still see yourself in your previous relationship? Do you still miss him despite the way you were rejected? Well, that’s a problem. Are you still connected with your best friend and just when you entered an intimate relationship with another guy, you realized that you’re in-love with him? Again, that’s a problem. Talk sincerely with your guy and openly discuss your problem. Tell him which direction you want to go. It may hurt him but he may understand.
4. You only see his or her faults. It is very easy to find faults in things. Sometimes, what we see is just a part of a larger picture. Imagine this. You cooked an omelet for your boyfriend’s breakfast. Unfortunately, it turned out to be overcooked. Now, if you put the food into your mouth, what’s the first thing that you will notice? It’s overcooked, right? So, you may not able to eat it and you may need to explain why. Many people feel that they need to tell every little flaw that they see in every situation. Even if you are in the position to do the criticism, you are risking your partner to feel hurt.
5. Expecting too much. Too much expectation can lead us to the road of too much disappointment. True. Sometimes we set goals only to disappoint ourselves because we did not achieve it. Sometimes we expect our partner to do something for us only to find out that he will not do it. In effect, you will tell yourself to not expect too much. That is the usual belief of humans – when you expect too high, you’ll get disappointed. We all know that disappointments bring trust issues in a relationship. And, it is fatal. What I can say is, don’t let your emotion control you. You got disappointed, so what? It is human nature to expect. You may fail but there’s still a chance. You may feel hurt but you can move on. Forgive.
6. You are working too much. Quality time is important in a relationship. Yes, you need to meet ends but you also need to find a good time to boost your relationship.
7. Being around too much. When you do things together, you are making your relationship strong. However, you are still two different persons and you must provide space to live each others life. Stop being too clingy before you feel like suffocating in each other’s presence.
8. Financial issues. It is important to have financial harmony in a relationship. When couples set plans and limits in their financial decisions, marriage dedication and good communication are sustained.
9. You are being insecure. Insecurity is defined as a feeling of not being “good enough”. This feeling occurs as a result of a sense of being unaccepted or rejected. Usually, a person who is always insecure has low self-esteem. Meaning, he may lack confidence in his abilities and skills. An insecure person has a negative perspective in life. He may think that he is ugly. Therefore, he will always compare himself to other people. What do you think about someone who always complains that he’s fat and not losing weight? What about a person who always feel upset because he feels like he is an outcast in a group? What about a girl who always think that she is being cheated every night? Obviously, they can have problems in establishing healthy relationships. It is a great feeling to be secured. But, it is something that requires a great effort to be felt.
10. Poor communication. Communication is the most important tool in a relationship. Therefore, couples must not stop communicating. There are some couples who are always together but don’t relate vey well. It is understood that, when they stopped communicating, they will also stop relating. As long as there is good communication in a relationship, every problem in every different situation can be solved without going through too much trouble.
Related Article:
Overcoming Insecurities
Tags: relationship problems, relationship, relationship issues, relationship questions, relationship problems, relationships, relationship advice, help relationships, conflict in relationships, insecurity, jealousy, communication, break-up, keirotopy
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